It’s time for you to get some friends.
You know, the kind of friends who support you in what you want to achieve and actually encourage you to reach your goals. Not the kinds of friends who secretly want you to fail because they want to feel better about themselves. We all know those kind.
Last night, I went to dinner with my good friend Stacy. And this was not any dinner. This was a 3-course dinner at Mr. Chow in New York City for NY’s Restaurant Week. Restaurant Week is like the adult version of visiting Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory as a kid. Some of the most exclusive, expensive restaurants in the city open their doors to the ‘common folk’ like me for an exquisite, 3-course meal for only $35.
Restaurant week is definitely not the best time to have made the personal resolution to not eat sugar or refined carbohydrates (anything with white flour). But, to those who are supporting me in this journey for sugar freedom, you’ll be glad to know that I did not waiver, thanks to a good friend.
These menus are unalterable. So, I couldn’t ask for extra broccoli rabe in the place of dessert. My only choice was to choose what to do with the gourmet dessert: to partake, or not to partake.
In a split second, thoughts of “when am I going to be back at Mr. Chow, really?” And “Ashley, an experience is worth forgoing your resolution to not have sugar for 30 days for 1 evening” began to wear on my steadfastness. On my other shoulder, I heard whispers of, “But you’ve committed to this- and this is why you committed because you never hold to your commitment with this! What are you going to do tomorrow? Blog and say that you screwed up on day 2? Ashley. Stick to this. You know you’ll feel better if you do.”
And at that moment, I got a little help from a friend. She helped me quiet my inner dialogue and encouraged me to hold my ground and stick to what I had started. She told me as she escorted the luscious coconut sorbet into her mouth, upon my encouragement of wanting her to enjoy it even though I chose not to, “It’s really nothing special.” Once I had gotten past the fork in the road of decision, I was fine.
I’m coming to realize that it’s just a bunch of small choices that leads to good things in life. And I’m not just talking about with food. I’m talking about in all areas of life: professionally, creatively, relationally. Keith Kochner, a mentor who teaches about personal growth and development, says “you aren’t big steps from anything, you are small shifts from everything.” Just a small shift in attitude, in determination, in thoughtfulness and attentive living. Here is to small shifts towards each of our greatness.